Journey in Grace

A few months ago we visited some dear friends of almost 40 years in Utah. It was so good to get away, if only for a few days. There were tears as we shared our heartaches of the past few years with each other but there was also much joy as we talked about God’s grace. There was laughter as we shared our memories of our Jesus people days with a few of our grown children. And listening to some of our old Jesus music took us back to simpler times.  Guitars were brought out for some singing of old praise songs.  It was  a beautiful time.

Friendships that last over decades are a rare gift. There was much healing that went on in my heart while we were there. It was good to be real and be with real people who truly cared for us.

A couple of days before we left for our trip I made the decision to shut down my Facebook. I felt I needed to begin living real again with Read the rest of this entry »

Today I read a prayer by Scotty Ward Smith for those who suffer from depression. I was struck by this phrase:

 For friends who are depressed for no other reason than they are living with a graceless, gospel-less heart, keep them miserable until they rest in the finished work of your Son, Jesus. May they despair of their own unrighteousness and their wannabe righteousness, until they are driven to the righteousness that comes from faith in Jesus. It’s good to be miserable unto mercy.

I don’t know the cause of my depression but I do know the result – I came back to the gospel and my first love. I had become so wrapped up in doing more and doing it better to gain the acceptance of God and those around me that I forgot the message of the cross. The message that He is never disappointed with me. He never turns His face from me. I can never do anything to add to my salvation because it was paid for in full. I can never surprise Him with my sin. I can honestly say it was good to stay miserable unto mercy.

Here is the prayer. I hope you will read it and be encouraged if you are suffering right now. And if you aren’t suffering, perhaps you are like I was and had pat answers for those who do suffer, please read it and maybe gain a new perspective.

Scotty’s Prayer

Blessings,

Susan

I’ve fought the idea of writing about my own story of depression and anxiety. I haven’t ever felt ‘well’ enough to write coherently, let alone find the courage to answer those who would disagree with me. Those who would think my pain was something I could or can control. Most people don’t understand depression/anxiety unless they have had it or have walked with someone who has. I was clueless to this whole issue until it happened to me, and it didn’t go away. Not for a long time. It still rears its ugly head from time to time.

Does that mean I can’t be a believer or that God is somehow disappointed in me? Does it mean I just don’t understand the sovereignty of God in my life? NO, it does not. This is not something I can control and believe me, if there was some to-do list that would make it stop I’d be all over it. But there’s not. There’s not even Read the rest of this entry »

Here’s a link to a blog by Lauren Larkin that reflects the beauty of the gospel by reminding us that He loved us first and He continues to love us even in our brokeness. I hope you are as encouraged by it as I was. Here’s the link:

http://liberatenet.org/2012/12/he-loved-first/

-Susan

Ray Ortlund has re-posted a piece on his blog that first appeared about a year ago. I posted it here when he first posted it and I’m posting it again now that it’s been re-posted. It’s that important and I need to hear it over and over. He said,

It’s what everyone needs. Everyone. Gospel + safety + time. A lot of gospel + a lot of safety + a lot of time.

Gospel: good news for bad people through the finished work of Christ on the cross and the endless power of the Holy Spirit. Multiple exposures. Constant immersion. Wave upon wave of grace and truth, according to the Bible.

Safety: a non-accusing environment. No finger-pointing. No embarrassing anyone. No manipulation. No oppression. No condescension. But respect and sympathy and understanding, where sinners can confess and unburden their souls.

Time: no pressure. Not even self-imposed pressure. No deadlines on growth. Urgency, but not hurry, because no one changes quickly. A lot of space for complicated people to rethink their lives at a deep level. God is patient.

This is what our churches must be: gentle environments of gospel + safety + time. It’s where we’re finally free to grow.

When we pressure other Christians to change in ways we think they should change (because after all, a believer looks a certain way), or if change doesn’t happen according to our time table (because after all, a believer looks a certain way), we are putting our own egos ahead of grace and the gospel. We are not preaching Christ, but ourselves. The Holy Spirit has His own time table for change. The church is called to be a gentle, patient, safe haven for broken sinners like us while the Holy Spirit gently works.  Colossians 3:12-15

http://thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/rayortlund/2012/11/18/gospel-safety-time/

-Mike

I’m reading a book by Tullian Tchividjian called Glorious Ruin. I’ve only read the introduction and chapter one and its already rocking my world. Tullian knows what it means to suffer and he doesn’t offer pat answers for those who are suffering. I can’t wait to finish it but until then, here is a taste of what its like:

 We are not responsible for finding the right formula to combat or unlock our suffering. The good news of the gospel does not consist of theological assertions or some elaborate religious how-to manual. The good news is Jesus Himself, the Man of Sorrows, the crucified God who meets us in our grief. Indeed, information, even information about Jesus, is relatively useless when it comes to the aching soul. Only the Holy Spirit can comfort a person in the depths of grief. Neil Young claims that “only love can break your heart.” But only God can heal it.

How many times have I offered up pat answers to someone else’s pain? How many times have I quoted Romans 8:28 to someone in the midst of a dark trial? How many times have I had a list of things for someone to do so that they could “get right with God”? Only God knows this and I cling to the truth that I am forgiven for my brutality toward other brothers and sisters. He took me into my own deep waters of pain and suffering to teach me that He meets me in my sorrow. It’s the precious work of the Holy Spirit to bring soothing balm to a wounded spirit. How great is that? There is still much pain, much sorrow in my heart but He is with me, showing me his love and acceptance. I can’t wait to read more of this book.

-Susan

I came across this quote by Tullian Tchividjian recently:

Does your ministry remove pressure or reinforce it? The gospel relieves pressure from sinners, it does not reinforce pressure on sinners.

This grabbed me because in my former days of performancism, putting external pressure on others to change in ways I thought they should change was the norm. If someone was going through a trial, the goal was to get them past it and back to a “normal” life. Performancism offers pat answers and quick fixes that are no fix at all, while leaving little or no room for struggling. If anything outside of our definition of “normal” should occur, the goal is to get back to “normal” as quickly as possible. But God speaks most intimately in our suffering and pain. The Holy Spirit speaks to our hearts the sweetest when we are at our lowest and have come to an end of ourselves. Performancism rushes through that because it’s more concerned with appearance than true growth in the Christian life. Performance-based Christianity is a theology of human glory. Tullian mentions,

“Theologies of glory” are approaches to Christianity (and to life) that try in various ways to minimize difficult and painful things, or to move past them rather than looking them square in the face and accepting them. Theologies of glory acknowledge the cross, but view it primarily as a means to an end—an unpleasant but necessary step on the way to personal improvement, the transformation of human potential. As Luther puts it, the theologian of glory “does not know God hidden in suffering. Therefore he prefers works to suffering, glory to the cross, strength to weakness, wisdom to folly, and, in general, good to evil.” The theology of glory is the natural default setting for human beings addicted to control and measurement. This perspective puts us squarely in the driver’s seat, after all.”

-Mike

A couple of days ago, my Bible reading took me back to the account of Jesus feeding the 5,000 in Luke’s account.

On their return the apostles told him all that they had done. And he took them and withdrew apart to a town called Bethsaida. When the crowds learned it, they followed him, and he welcomed them and spoke to them of the kingdom of God and cured those who had need of healing. (Luke 9:10-11)

The twelve had just returned from being sent out to preach the gospel and take care of the needy. They were no doubt weary and probably looking forward to some down time with Jesus and possibly even getting away from the crowds for a while.  Luke tells us that Jesus withdrew with them to Bethsaida.

But while there, the crowds showed up unexpectedly. How did Jesus Read the rest of this entry »

My friend came over today and while we were talking about the poor, she shared this passage with me.  What a heavy and needless yoke we carry when we are preoccupied with criticizing others when we should be spending our time pouring ourselves out for the hungry and satisfying the desires of the afflicted.

Then you shall call, and the LORD will answer; you shall cry, and he will say, ‘Here I am.’ If you take away the yoke from your midst, the pointing of the finger, and speaking wickedness, if you pour yourself out for the hungry and satisfy the desire of the afflicted, then shall your light rise in the darkness and your gloom be as the noonday. And the LORD will guide you continually and satisfy your desire in scorched places and make your bones strong; and you shall be like a watered garden, like a spring of water, whose waters do not fail. (Isaiah 58:9-11)

Lord Jesus, change my heart to turn away from needless things that distract me from why I’m here.  Read the rest of this entry »

Ray Ortund has written a great piece called Gospel + Safety + Time. This should be the ministry philosophy of any church. Here’s what he had to say:

It’s what everyone needs.  Everyone.  Gospel + safety + time.  A lot of gospel + a lot of safety + a lot of time.

Gospel: good news for bad people through the finished work of Christ on the cross and the present power of the Holy Spirit.  Multiple exposures.  Constant immersion.  Wave upon wave of grace and truth, according to the Bible.

Safety: a non-accusing environment.  No finger-pointing.  No embarrassing anyone.  No manipulation.  No oppression.  No condescension.  But respect and sympathy and understanding, where sinners can confess and unburden their souls.

Time: no pressure.  Not even self-imposed pressure.  No deadlines on growth.  No rush.  No hurry.  But a lot of space for complicated people to rethink their lives at a deep level.  If we relax, trusting in God’s patience, we actually get going.

This is what our churches must be: gentle environments of gospel + safety + time.  It’s the only way anyone can ever change.

Who doesn’t need that?

http://thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/rayortlund/2012/01/27/gospel-safety-time/

More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us. (Romans 5:3-5)

Sometimes I lose hope. It’s usually because I stop looking outside of myself for my hope and joy, and start gazing instead at my own spiritual navel, basing my hope on circumstances of the moment that seem slow to change. Or they seem like they’re not changing at all. At other times it’s due to personal pity parties that I like to throw on occasion, usually after spending Read the rest of this entry »

Suffering deepens and enriches our experience of grace in ways that can only happen by suffering.  Oftentimes suffering is the tool that God uses to stir up a passion for Jesus and the gospel that has grown cold.  I don’t need to suffer to understand and believe the gospel, but I’ve noticed a pattern in myself and in others close to me with similar experiences in their own gospel wakening, where suffering in some form is what God brought into our lives to gently awaken us to the sweet aroma of the gospel and a renewed passion for the beauty of Jesus.  Sometimes he brings us back to our first love by the tough things we go through and the ugly things he lets us see in ourselves.  But even then, he is gentle and compassionate.  Look at this description of Jesus from Isaiah.

…a bruised reed he will not break, and a faintly burning wick he will not quench; he will faithfully bring forth justice. (Isaiah 42:3)

Sometimes God bruises us to give us eyes to see things and a heart to love things that had we not been bruised, we would never perceive and understand from the heart.  Sometimes he bruises us to deepen our love for him and our compassion for others. Our bruising gentles us down and magnifies Jesus in us. But even in our bruising, he is kind, compassionate, and Read the rest of this entry »

About 3 weeks ago, my wife and I came across a blog on depression entitled, Doctrine Cures Depression. After reading it and spending some time talking through her own experiences with depression and my experiences as her care-giver, she was compelled to write a response in an attempt to bring up some of the common misconceptions that we’ve seen and heard over the years in a couple of different Christian settings. Unfortunately, her response has not been posted as of this writing, so we want to post it here, alongside the original blog post. We do this not to pick a fight, but because we feel strongly that the views expressed in the original blog are wrong and harmful in dealing with depressed Christians. Susan’s views expressed below are also my views as He’s taught me ways to care for a depressed Christian and I pray that the Lord will use them to His glory and in His way.

Here’s the original post that prompted her response: Read the rest of this entry »

The following is a short devotional that I gave at a wedding shower of a young friend of ours. I thought I would share it with you.

———————-

I’m so happy for the two of you. Its been a blessing to watch you two come together and grow in your love for the Lord and for each other. I’m sure you have covered a lot in your counseling sessions so my focus will be a little different. The roles of husband and wife are so important and you will spend a lifetime growing in these areas.

But I want to talk about the simplicity of grace and kindness in a marriage. While channel chasing years ago, I saw an old couple being interviewed on a Christian channel, so I stopped to watch it. One of the things they shared as a turning point in their marriage was kindness. Sometimes we get so caught up in what we are to be doing as a wife, and what our husband should be doing as the leader, that we forget some basic attitudes. We all know that we should Read the rest of this entry »